Art & CultureFrom the Archive
Kids Say the Darndest Things
This morning on Jezebel, I read a story about how ten-year old, Eliza Sayers wrote a rant in response to some sexist remarks made by mean, elementary school boys in the children fashion clothing catalogue, Miniboden. The article asks to boys the provocative question: what is the difference between girls and boys?
Got that, boys?
My God, she’s like a little lesbian waiting to burst out into the new world!
Clearly, you boys have yet to see Lars and the Real Girl. I’ve got two words for you, internet porn. And someday, you’ll find yourself lonely on a Saturday night drinking Bud Light waiting for a “brown box” to be delivered to your door while surfing boobtube.com.
What’s wrong with pink? Pink was like the new black back in 1998. And frankly, I couldn’t limit my wardrobe to pink—that would be crazy. I consider myself a multi-color girl—I don’t discriminate against colors, yo.
I don’t really understand the comparison. That’s like saying girls like eating oranges and boys like horseback riding. WTF? Clearly, none of these boys have lived through the eighties, or been at a Depeche Mode concert, or visited a military base after Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.
Not if you aim for their balls. They’ll go down like a bitch.
Something I’ve spent many a years pondering myself, especially during the years 2007 to 2009 while watching my ex-boyfriend smell, and then wear old underwear from the hamper because he refused to do laundry for the month.
Eliza wrote some very astute comments. Check out these gems:
In response to the assertion that “girls like nail polish; boys like soccer,” she writes:
“…my friend Heidi is a master soccer player. You mess with her, she kicks you in the shins, or maybe just trips you on the field. Seriously I think you should stay away. For reals.”
Got that, boys?
And how about her response to the statement: “boys are rougher and stronger.”
“Okay one thing is that I could beat many boys in a wrestling competition that is up to my grade. Like at lunch today, I was...arm wrestling my friend that happens to be a boy. I beat him.”
My God, she’s like a little lesbian waiting to burst out into the new world!
So, in support of girl power, and the fact that I’ve been channeling my own inner, strong black woman, I’d like to bolster some of Eliza’s responses with my own:
"Girls Like dolls, and Boys don't".
Clearly, you boys have yet to see Lars and the Real Girl. I’ve got two words for you, internet porn. And someday, you’ll find yourself lonely on a Saturday night drinking Bud Light waiting for a “brown box” to be delivered to your door while surfing boobtube.com.
"Girls wear pink, and Boys wear blue and green."
What’s wrong with pink? Pink was like the new black back in 1998. And frankly, I couldn’t limit my wardrobe to pink—that would be crazy. I consider myself a multi-color girl—I don’t discriminate against colors, yo.
"Girls like nail polish; Boys like Soccer Balls.”
I don’t really understand the comparison. That’s like saying girls like eating oranges and boys like horseback riding. WTF? Clearly, none of these boys have lived through the eighties, or been at a Depeche Mode concert, or visited a military base after Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.
"Boys are rougher and stronger."
Not if you aim for their balls. They’ll go down like a bitch.
Keep it loud
