My Meets Obsession Party Fail that Led To My Santa List

After parking my slightly beat up Mercury Sable in the lot of Franconia Springfield Metro Station, I was filled with general excitement about my writing career. I was attending my first Meets Obsession gathering--an intimate cocktail party celebrating Meets Obsession's first issue.

Finally, I was in da club! (So screw you, crappy, high school memories.)

To get amped up, I celebrated with friends the night before with alcohol, baked macaroni and cheeseburger sliders--all fitting food items to eat before a fashion party.

I stood at the metro station, dutifully waiting until I heard the operator on the intercom say: "Customers, we are expecting delays on the Blue Line. You can take a free shuttle bus. Please add 30 minutes to your travel time.”

Dear Metro. I. Hate. You.

Around 9pm, I ended up on 20^th street trying to catch a cab. The party ended in one hour, and I was still far, far away.

The night was an epic fail. I stared at my freshly printed business cards that were depressingly scattered in my black leather purse. My once, bouncy curls were matted down by the rain, and my cell phone dead.

(Cue "All by Myself," Celine Dione version, circa 1996.)

How could I turn this situation into something positive? I could create a list to Santa that will bring me into the 21^st century, and save me from having this situation happen again.

I went home and got out my Hello Kitty stationary and wrote:

Dear Santa,

I hope you find this letter well. I left you some delicious, chocolate chip cookies along with organic milk held in an authentic vintage bottle. I have compiled a list of items I'd like from you that will help me avoid awkward conversations, missed appointments, and general unhappiness.

1. Ipod Nano

$128.00

A music journalist without an Ipod? Blasphemy! How am I supposed to survive public transit, gym workouts, and awkward conversations from people in elevators? I beg you Santa for a brand new Ipod Nano (preferably pink). Plus, I am pretty sure it comes with a GPS app. 

2. Magic 8 Ball

$9.99

There is no better way for me to make irrational decisions and have false reassurance than with a Magic 8 ball. With 20 answers and only 5 negative responses, this object will give me false hope.

3. Gray Kitten

Adoption Fee: $55

This furry little creature will serve as a constant reliable companion. He/she will always agree with me because I feed it and give it treats. Sometimes, significant others can’t do the trick.  If it’s a girl I will name her Cupcake, and if it's a boy, I will name him George.

4. Poster of Metric’s Lead Singer: Emily Haines

$12.51

I need this for inspirational purposes. Everyone should have a poster of someone or something they believe in--and my inspiration comes from Emily Haines. I am ready to take down my Fight Club poster and put Emily up in its place.

5. Dream Catcher

$15.95

This might help with my string of nightmares issue.  As the old saying goes, if it rains it pours, and I am ready to live in the now and sleep soundly without those pesky little nightmares of my boyfriend being addicted to porn.